April Fool's Day, Mao Ling. Part 6/8

Personal Log. Chief Communications Officer, Mao Ling. 04.01.3001.

Today, I was speaking with the Corinthian alliance, trying to explain why we deviated from our set flight plan, circled two of their moons and for reasons that are still unclear, destroyed several of their cable television satellites. All of a sudden, my voice box malfunctioned and I was only allowed to speak in rudimentary French. It was most disconcerting to be limited to phrases like Voila le stylo (There is the pen), Ou sont le mutard (Where is the mustard) and Je voudrais travailler ton dindon (I would like to work your turkey).

Luckily Corinthians are fascinated with all things sensual and erotic. They have a deep fascination for French Cinema ever since the space explorer, Jacques Cartier Goldman exchanged a copy of Le Placard* for a pound of the Corinthians favorite delicacy, Jimmy Dean's Sausage. After a half hour of French misnomers I was able to communicate our apologies. Although, I fear in exchange for their forgiveness I may have bartered the French remake of Weekend at Bernie's and "une chien de Francais" (a French Dog).

After the debacle, Ped Varook discovered an outside carrier signal to my voice box that appeared to be the cause of my French dyslexia. However, we were unable to find the source.


* Le Placard is about Francois Pignon, or as his coworkers like to think of him, "Pignon le mignon"(Pignon the cutey). Pignon pretends to be gay so that his bosses can not fire him from his job in a condom factory.