Report to Arcadian Command by 1st Lieutenant Greeg'u. 04.15.3001.(English Translation)
After high-jacking a Voncat ship, the task force was on route to the UIN outpost at Sigma Prime under the guise of a Voncat Peacekeeping envoy. Our mission was to sneak into the central command station in that sector and disable there defenses, whereby an Arcadian Fleet would takeover the sector. The plan was sound. This section of space is virtually unguarded by UIN patrols, the foul humans believing that it is beyond our touch. A successful mission would have granted us a sizeable advantage in our war against the insipid humans.
Five Hours from our destination, we encountered a UIN Cruiser. Keeping with our cover as Voncat Peacekeepers, we attempted to convince the repugnant humans that we wished to dine with them. When their commanders were on board we would have slaughtered them and then gorged on their insides in victory. By means that are beyond my reckoning, they saw through our plan and fired upon us.
We took up a position behind their ship and were preparing to target their engines when they emptied their waste. I was at first confounded by this strategy until our sensors picked up the signature of a canine corpse of poodle origin that had been scalded by high temperatures. This of course is the secret code to abort our mission. Only later did we discover it was all a ruse.
How the wretched humans were able to discover our mission codes, we'll never know, but their captain must be a cunning man in order to pull off such a feet. I will enjoy engaging him in battle and when I have defeated him I will drive an Arcadian lance up his anal cavity and mount him on the front hull of an Arcadian Raptor.
Death to humans.
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